DC Girls' Weekend

My best friend Kerry flew in from Boston the day after Abby's big 7th birthday party...the fun never stops around here (not even for a little break!).  I unpacked from those two days at my parents' house, and immediately repacked my overnight bag for a girls' weekend in DC.  Kerry and I had been trying to plan a time to get together (the last time we saw each other was when she flew out to stay with us last summer), and it worked out that she could squeeze in a trip during the few free days I had between Abby's birthday party and our beach trip.  When she visited last year, we just stayed at my house and tried to catch up as best as we could with three kids running around us constantly--Kerry is such a good sport about my crazy kids, and was an awesome honorary aunt taking them to the playground and entertaining them with me for days...but she and I didn't get a lot of time to really talk with each other.  No matter how much we both love my kids, we just couldn't get to the good stuff with them around!  So this year, I convinced Dan to let me have a few days away from the house with Kerry--he was off work before starting his new job, so we had that flexibility.  I thought Dan would benefit from a few days with the kids (actually, the first time he'd been totally on his own with all three of them for an overnight ever--the only other time I've been gone for more than a day, he took the kids down to stay at his parents' house), and I knew I would benefit from some down time with my BFF!

As soon as Dan gave me the green light, I started planning--we wanted to stay in DC, so we picked the Hotel Monaco, within walking distance of pretty much anything and everything we could want to see.  I've lived in the DC area off and on since 1992, so there's really not much in DC that I haven't already done, and Kerry has been to DC many, many times...it's not like we really needed to be tourists, but we wanted to be in the middle of things.  I picked her up at the airport early on a Sunday morning and we went into Old Town Alexandria, where we got SOAKING wet in a torrential downpour on our way to lunch at one of my favorite places, Bread & Chocolate.  The waitress actually got paper towels for us after we were seated, because we were literally dripping with rain!  That didn't put a damper on our day--I was so excited to see Kerry, have the time to talk with her, and the freedom to go do whatever we wanted for a few days!  The rain did let up by the time we were done eating, so we walked around Old Town for a bit before heading into DC.  We made a quick stop at Arlington National Cemetery to see the Kennedy burial sites, and then we made our way to our hotel.  We were staying directly across from the National Portrait Gallery, so we walked over there after checking into the hotel.  Kerry dubbed our versions of DC-tourist activities as "DC-Lite"--we pretty much skipped through the things in which we didn't have much interest and went straight for things that caught our eye, and we didn't linger too much on anything!  It was perfect--we got in some culture while also talking nonstop about what is going on in our lives.  So much to catch up on!

this weird aluminum foil exhibit won't leave my brain

After the Portrait Gallery, we went back to our hotel room and got changed for dinner--by that point, it was raining again, so we went with the path of least resistance and picked a restaurant directly behind the hotel.  We walked in, and I was a little surprised that it seemed like kind of a dive...but, whatever--if they had a good burger, that would be fine with me.  We ordered chips and salsa, and I was chattering away when Kerry told me she could be good to finish our appetizer and head out.  I figured she was sketched out by the dive-y nature of the place, and I was up for anything, so I agreed to finish the chips and go.  After we got out to the street, Kerry informed me that rushed exit was due to the fact that our waitress was practically naked--she apparently had her jeans unbuttoned and unzipped and was not wearing any underwear!  Seriously??  How did I miss this (and why, why did that situation occur in the first place)?  Good call on not eating the prepared food from that establishment, Kerry--you probably saved us some nasty stomach bug.  We were totally stuffed from the chips and salsa, so we just walked and talked in the rain--DC was pretty quiet that evening, and we walked all the way to the National Mall and then back toward our hotel.  We discovered a Walgreens on our walk, so we stopped in to pick up some treats to take back to our hotel--and were totally floored by the most amazing Walgreens we'd ever seen.  It was three stories tall, had a nail salon and a frozen yogurt bar!  Absolutely crazy--best find ever.

check out the frozen yogurt toppings bar INSIDE Walgreens!

We indulged in some delicious frozen yogurt, bought chocolate to eat later, and headed back to our hotel for the night.  Kerry is a big gym rat at home, so we picked a hotel that had a gym--we got up and worked out together the following morning, which was a great way to start the day!  It was a rainy day again, so we headed out with our complimentary Hotel Monaco umbrellas and walked until we dropped.  We wound through the Sculpture Garden on our way to the National Mall, and then spent a few hours in the National Museum of the American Indian--Kerry is a high school English teacher who teaches a book about American Indians, and she wanted some information and photos to add to her lessons...any kid who has her as a teacher is so lucky!  We then hit Kerry's favorite spot in DC, the Botanical Gardens--absolutely beautiful, and amazing that they create so many different climates and grow so many types of plants and flowers!  We made an obligatory stop on the steps of the Capitol and then walked all the way to the MLK Memorial--that's 2 miles, folks.  Just to get there.  Then we had to walk back--and this was on a super hot day after we had already walked at least another 2 miles!  We finally made it back to civilization, and stopped at the first restaurant we came to (we refused to eat street vendor food since we had been so healthy that day with the gym that morning and all the walking) for a late lunch of sandwiches.  My legs felt like they were still walking after I sat down...it was painful to get back up again!  After we ate, Kerry took me on a tour of some of her favorite clothing stores--I never shop, so this was an intimidating education for me.  H&M was huge, crowded, and crazy.  Forever 21 overwhelmed me.  The Gap wasn't so bad--I've been in there before, so at least I was familiar!  Kerry thinks I need to go on What Not To Wear--as I've said before, I don't disagree.  She tried to update my style, but I'm pretty set in my jeans-and-t-shirt ways--she did manage to get me out of my standard summer footwear of UVa flip flops and into some more-stylish Havaianas black flip flops, so I'd call that a major fashion victory for her!  We managed not to break the bank, and limped our way back to the hotel for a break before dinner.

We decided to go to Old Ebbitt Grill near the White House for dinner--we hadn't yet been by the White House on this visit (we tend to take a picture of ourselves in front of it whenever Kerry is in town!), so we wanted to go by after dinner.  It was a gorgeous night, and we got our picture.  :)

Kerry, me, and the White House

Kerry got up and went to the gym the next morning before we checked out of the hotel, but I couldn't drag myself out of bed to go with her--I was SO tired from our DC adventure the day before!  I did eventually get up, and we drove around DC a bit more before heading back to my real life--we were supposed to meet Dan and the kids at the boys' gymnastics class and then get lunch with them, but Jake threw up that morning, so gymnastics was cancelled!  Poor Dan had to deal with kids throwing up while I was gone...  Kerry and I got lunch together and then headed to my house, where the kids were thrilled to see her and show her everything in the house--they wouldn't leave her alone!  We all went out to dinner that night (Jake was feeling much better, thankfully!), and then I had to take Kerry to the airport the following morning.  Three days go by so fast, but it was a wonderful, restorative visit with the girl who knows me best--I can't wait to plan the next Kerry-and-Jill getaway!

Kerry with my kiddos--they LOVE her!

I have to give a huge shout out to my awesome husband, who not only let me escape the daily grind for a few days while he held down the fort at home with the kids, but he did a tremendous job!  He led the kids in Lego building competitions, read lots of stories, and even took all three kids to the National Air & Space Museum Udvar-Hazy Center to see the Discovery space shuttle!  Amazing--that's an outing that this well-versed stay-at-home mom probably wouldn't have attempted by myself, so I was super impressed with Dan's desire and execution--he made some great memories with the kids, and that meant everything to me.  Great job, honey--and thank you for my girls' weekend!

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

My dear friend Brynne and I have been friends since we were 4 years old, living on the same military base in California.  Her dad got a job in Maryland after a few years in California, and after a number of moves, my family ended up in Virginia for my dad's final job in the Navy when I was 12 years old.  Brynne and I were so excited to be "near" each other again--a few hours' drive is nothing when you're part of a military family and your friends are flung all over the world!  Brynne's family brought her to my parents' house for week-long sleepovers in the summertime, I danced to country music at her parents' house (Garth Brooks and Tim McGraw were big!)--I even drove to Maryland to see Brynne perform in her high school's staging of Li'l Abner.  We met in Baltimore to see the national tour of Les Miserables (kicking off my love of Les Mis and musical theater in general).  We went on a double date sophomore year of high school to Kings Dominion amusement park in Richmond, VA.  Although we did see each other often in those early years of being in neighboring states, we had our own lives and went through long periods where we weren't in touch.  Imagine my surprise my junior year of high school when I checked in for my event at a track meet (the 200m--ugh...) only to see Brynne competing against me in the same event--we had no idea each other would be there, nor that we both ran sprints!  Ha ha.  She beat me handily (the 100 was about as long as I ever wanted to run), and we spent the rest of the meet on my school's bus, away from the noise, catching up on our lives.  She went to college in North Carolina, I stayed in Virginia--we weren't really in touch for those years, although we reconnected when Dan and I got engaged and I knew she had to be in my wedding--that's the kind of friendship we have.  Two years later, I was honored to be in her wedding.  She came all the way to Ohio for my baby shower when I was pregnant with Abby, and she was one of the first visitors we had at the hospital when Jake was born.  She was a lifeline for me when Dan was deployed in 2010 and I lived at my parents' house--she drove an hour each way with her own two kids to hang out with me when Alex was a newborn and I was a mess.  I feel so fortunate for her lifelong friendship, and for the fact that we only live about an hour away from each other at this time in our lives.  It's pretty amazing to see our kids playing together--it's like Jill and Brynne, Part II when Abby and Brynne's daughter get together.  :)  Brynne is a strong, amazing, beautiful, fun girl with the best laugh on the planet--I'm so glad she lived across the street from me 28 years ago so that we could be in each other's lives.

Brynne and me in kindergarten--gymnastics in the talent show!

With her daughter and Abby in school now, our days are not as flexible as they once were--Brynne and I don't get too see each other too much during the school year, other than to celebrate the kids' birthdays.  We have been making an effort to get out every few months, just the two of us--we met for dinner and a movie last fall, we went out for lunch a few months ago, and then Brynne made an awesome suggestion:  Why not take a whole day away from our husbands and kids and go to Kings Dominion like when we were 15 years old?  We coordinated our calendars and came up with a day that worked for both our families--this past Sunday!  I am a huge amusement park fan, but I was a bit nervous--I hadn't been on adult roller coasters since Dan and I went to one for my 24th birthday in Denver...  I was also nervous about leaving Dan to handle a whole day by himself with the kids--I know that sounds kind of silly, because why would that be an issue?  Well, believe it or not, Dan has not had an entire day (wake up to bedtime) by himself with our kids since we started having kids seven years ago.  Not kidding.  That seems crazy to me, but the only other time I've been gone for a day or more was when I went to Boston to visit Kerry in 2011, and Dan took the kids to his parents' house for that trip--so he had a lot of help in my absence!  I've been gone from the kids a few times, but Dan is usually with me...so this was going to be the first time he would be on his own.  I left him with a pep talk, a few scrawled notes for the day, a refrigerator filled with leftovers to heat up for dinner, and hoped for the best!

I got up early and headed out to meet Brynne as the kids were having their breakfast Sunday morning--I purposefully didn't do anything to help with the morning craziness, other than lift Alex out of his crib when I said goodbye, because I wanted Dan to experience the whole day on his own.  :)  It was my day off!  I had a great drive down to where we were meeting, and then I hopped in Brynne's car for the rest of the drive down to Kings Dominion.  We got to the park around 10:30am, and it was cool and overcast--much better than a hot day, but we were both glad we had worn layers.  Here we are looking fresh and excited upon arrival at the park:

Brynne's smile is contagious!

I was looking forward to the coasters, but mostly, I was just giddy about spending the day with my friend, getting to talk about anything and everything...and not having to deal with any kids all day!  I think we were both a little shocked by our lack of stuff--Brynne carried a small backpack for our few things (keys, phones, glasses, tissues for me and my crazy allergies), but I didn't have anything at all...and it was weird!  I'm so used to having a bag with kid-stuff in it, and at least one kid holding my hand at all times--it felt surreal to have that kind of freedom for an entire day.  It was pretty great, I'm not gonna lie.  :)  We spent a lot of time talking about our kiddos, of course, and we missed them terribly, but I firmly believe that getting away for a day makes us better mothers--just because we have kids doesn't mean we shouldn't carve out some time for ourselves to refresh...even though that is hard!

It was the perfect day at the park--it didn't rain at all, the weather was pleasant (I kept my light jacket on all day), and most importantly, there were NO LINES for any of the rides!  We rode every roller coaster in the park before 1pm--some of them more than once!  It was a trip down memory lane for me--I had season tickets to Kings Dominion every summer I was in high school, and I had been there so many times...including one important time with Dan shortly before he moved to New York prior to our senior year of high school (we bought cotton candy and shaved ice and I sang "Seasons of Love" from Rent to him as we sat on one of the stone walls--it was a memorable moment as we prepared for our 525,600 minutes apart...oh, the drama of high school love!).  It was also a reminder of how old I am--a lot of the rides have changed theme or disappeared completely since I was last there.  The Days of Thunder car race ride no longer exists, because that movie probably wasn't worthy of a ride devoted to it in the first place!  The Hurler wooden coaster used to be themed around Wayne's World, with a Stan Nikita's Diner replica right next to it, and Bohemian Rhapsody blasted over the speakers while you waited in line--I still remember Garth telling me that the ride was designed "to test the integrity of straps and snaps" on the pre-ride TV reel (and that right there tells you how many times I've been to KD!).  Now The Hurler has a 50's doo-wop theme--no trace of Wayne's World anywhere, and Brynne and I were too chicken to ask the high schoolers working the ride when it had changed theme...we were worried they would not even know what Wayne's World was!  I also didn't tolerate the coasters as well as I used to--I definitely felt queasy after each one, and it took my stomach some time to settle back down.  That part was rough--I love coasters, and I didn't love feeling like I was going to puke!  I think my congestion was making it worse, but still...I'm getting old.  It also put something else in perspective for me--all the times when my brother, sister, and I dragged my parents to amusement parks and forced either my mom or dad to ride a ride with the odd man out of our 3-kid family...my poor parents!  That thought gave me flashes of my future, riding with one of our kids 10 years from now--when the rides do more than make me queasy...ugh.  I appreciated my parents more than ever after those thoughts occurred to me!

getting ready to ride The Intimidator 305--yes, that's the drop!

After our whirlwind of all the coasters, we stopped for lunch--I was shocked to see that Kings Dominion now offers real food, not just standard park crap food (although that's still there, too, if you're nostalgic for greasy hot dogs).  We were able to get lunch at Subway right there in the park--some of my concerns about my calorie intake for the day were alleviated once we saw the Subway!  Brynne did get a bag of Doritos, though, and those things are totally my weakness--I ate a few, and even though we both agreed that they didn't taste as great as we remembered, we polished off that bag together!  We opted to see a show after lunch (so that we didn't lose our lunches on more coasters!), and there was a country song show ending nearby.  We sat down, watched the end of that show, and then watched the karaoke show that came afterward.  Now, you need to know that Brynne and I have a long history of singing together--we used to sit next to each other on the bus to kindergarten and first grade, and our bus driver would hand us the mic for the whole bus, and we would entertain all the other passengers with our vocal stylings (not sure how we didn't have more enemies!).  We also sang together in the school talent show in first grade--although I use the word "sang" loosely, not because we weren't good singers, but because Brynne got the giggles and laughed through our entire a capella rendition of "Tomorrow" from Annie.  Her famous, contagious giggle...the entire audience was in stitches, I was totally mortified, and we almost knocked each other off the stage trying to elbow each other back to seriousness.  I think we were probably the highlight of the whole talent show, although not for the reasons we wanted to be!  When we went to Kings Dominion in high school together, we recorded ourselves singing "That's What Friends are For" in the singing booth there--and we fully intended to record an updated version on Sunday.  Unfortunately, we couldn't find a singing booth--maybe those things are gone now that youtube and webcams are ready to record every embarrassing thing you do?  But there was that karaoke show...hmmm.

Brynne tried to convince me to get up and do a song myself, but I told her there was no way I was singing on stage without her!  She thought it would be terribly embarrassing, but I pointed out that we didn't know anyone at the park, would never see them again, and we could even go by fake names if she felt more comfortable doing that!  Ha ha.  We walked over to the song board after the show and were trying to see if there was a song we could do together when the guy with the sign-up clipboard came by.  I asked if we could do a duet, and he said sure...so Sarah and Jenny signed up for the 6pm show!  For the record, I was Jenny.  :)  It was 3pm at that point, so we walked around the park, got some Rita's Frozen Custard (yum!! and so much for my calorie count!), rode a few coasters again, and then headed back over to the stage.  We got cotton candy to amp us up on sugar before our big debut, and then it was time to go on.  We sang first out of 3 other singers for that show--we did "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" (duh).  Sadly, we got no audio or video of the performance, and I honestly couldn't even hear us singing because the music was so loud and the speakers were facing out to the audience...but we had a great time singing, dancing, and acting like total dorks.  :)  I even told the audience about our 1st grade talent show debacle, and how this was a much-needed chance to redeem ourselves.  Brynne didn't laugh this time--although I almost did when we introduced ourselves as Sarah and Jenny!  It was really stupid fun, and I think it's the only time in my life when I haven't had stage fright.  Seriously, no one knew us--who cares if we made fools of ourselves!

driving the antique cars on the wooded path

We ended our day with a final ride on a few of our favorite coasters (The Grizzly is our old school wooden favorite, and the Intimidator 305 rocked our socks off--wow, that thing was fast!), and then we got dinner and sat at an outside table, talking until the park closed at 8pm.  Yep, we closed down the park!  The whole day flew by so fast--we talked the whole drive back to my car, and then sat in her car talking for at least another hour...we probably could have done two days at the park and still had more to discuss!

Brynne has always been an inspiration for me--she has such a positive outlook on life and just a great attitude, and her friendship makes me a better person.  I'm so thankful that we were able to take this day out together--it was a blast, it went by way too fast, and we're already scheming our next escape!  :)  Thanks for such a fantastic idea, a fabulous day, and a priceless friendship, Brynne!  :)

Nighttime Black Hole

This week has disappeared on me--most likely in a sleepy haze.  I've been trying to get to bed by midnight, and around 10pm every night, I always feel good about my bedtime prospects.  I don't know what happens after that, because it's been more like 1am before I fall into bed in an exhausted stupor!  Last night, Dan was watching one of his DVR'd shows (Through the Wormhole, the Morgan Freeman hosted shows on the Science Channel), and he fell asleep while watching it--I swear, I learn more from those shows than he does, because even though I'm not watching with him, I am at least awake until the end and hear it all!  And then when Dan watches it again another night (you know, because he fell asleep the first time), I get the joy of hearing it all over again.  This could happen up to 4 times for a single show, because he can't manage to stay awake.  Once on a fourth showing, I was quoting the episode to make the point that I'd heard it a thousand times already--and I don't even like those shows!  It should be me falling asleep because they are so boring, not the guy who DVR'd them in the first place.  Anyway, back to last night--Dan fell asleep, and when the show ended, the TV automatically went to the last channel it was on and started playing that show...which happened to be a really old episode of Friends (and I mean really old--Rachel had just left Barry at the altar).  I had laundry to fold, so I sat down in front of the TV with my laundry baskets and got to work while being amused by the early Friend antics.  It was only 11pm, after all, and I deserve some entertainment while I finish up my chores, right?  Well, whatever channel I was watching apparently does a Friends marathon at night, so one episode slid unnoticed into another, until it was 12:30am!  I feel like I'm usually very efficient during the day, but at night, some weird alternate-time universe takes over my brain and I lose all concept of time.  Sometimes I just can't believe that I sacrifice wonderful, amazing, sought-after, beautiful sleep for things like old episodes of Friends, or refreshing the MSN homepage, or balancing our checkbook.  Seriously--what is my problem?

my nighttime curse

(I thought Dan would appreciate the title of this blog--not only do I spend countless hours listening to his shows about phenomena like black holes, but my evenings turn into black holes that suck me in and force me to lose hours!)  The only good thing that came out of last night was that I managed not to eat anything after the kids went to bed--I was toying with the idea of cutting up some strawberries and dipping them in chocolate, but we called Dan's parents and didn't get off the phone with them until around 9:30pm...and I really try not to eat anything that late.  It was a battle--I was still fixated on the idea of making the snack around 11pm, but I held strong and didn't eat anything.  The long hours at night really make it hard not to snack on junk!  And now I'm tired today--it's Friday, and I tend to be tired on Fridays no matter what I do.  The weeks are just long and wearing--by Friday, I'm ready to take it easy!  Of course, I have to vacuum the house and have enough energy for a Zumba class tonight--so no taking it easy for me today.  I'm looking forward to this weekend, though, because I get to have a girls' day with my awesome friend Brynne tomorrow!  We haven't gotten together without our kids in way too long (I don't even want to figure out how long it's been, because that will depress me), so this is a huge treat.  I can't wait to have some fun, laugh, catch up, most likely eat stuff I shouldn't, most likely stay up and out too late, and basically have a great time with the girl I've been giggling with since I was 4 years old.  :)  Hooray for a girls' days!!  Thank you to our husbands for giving us some time off from our jobs!  ;)

this is so going to be us--right, Brynne?

It's going to be a great end to a weird week--I think my sleepiness has thrown off my mood.  Plus, my Wednesday Zumba class, which I normally love, was a total bust...the substitute who doesn't teach very well was there instead of our regular teacher, so my friend and I skipped out after 15 minutes and walked around the track outside the gym instead.  We walked 2 miles, but it's not the same as a good Zumba class!  I know we're having a sub in tonight's Zumba class, too...and I really, really hope it's not that girl again.  She's sweet, but her class is a mess--and I need a good workout tonight to make up for whatever I eat tomorrow!  I hope you all have a good weekend, and wish me luck not blowing all my efforts this week in one day!  :)

Loose Ends

I feel like I've thrown a lot of things out there the last few weeks, so I thought I would tie up some loose ends today, in case any of you were curious!

First of all, my best friend Kerry is doing much better, other than the fact that she tried to go back to work today when she should have stayed home recuperating...  She's feeling better, but she still doesn't have her strength back up, so she ended up fainting at work and back at the hospital this morning!  Ugh...at least she's home now, and it was just a case of doing too much too soon.  I still wish I could be there, but hopefully today was the last hospital visit for a while!  I'm trying to convince her to take it easy the rest of the week, but she's stubborn.  :)  She's a teacher, earning her doctorate, and heavily involved in her community as well as her friends--her schedule is usually jam-packed, so I'm selfishly happy that her forced time off has allowed us to talk more the last few weeks than usual.  If I can't be there in person, that's the next best thing!

anyone need a house?

Second, we have been waiting and waiting to hear if the person who expressed interest in purchasing our house in Ohio wanted to move forward with sale.  We just heard from him on Saturday, and he is not ready to purchase anything right now.  I am totally bummed--I kept hoping that since he had searched us out when our house wasn't even on the market, he was seriously interested and would decide to buy the house.  We weren't even thinking about selling the house, but once that idea was on the table and I did all the research, I really felt like it was the best possible outcome for us.  So without this buyer, it's back to the rental market we go...and our current tenants are moving out at the end of this month!  We don't have a lot of time to market and get new folks in, so that means we'll probably be carrying our entire mortgage payment along with our rent for this house for at least a month or two...a little stressful.  The interested buyer did indicate that he might be in a better position to buy something next year, so maybe we'll have another shot at this next year?  I won't hold my breath this time!

Third, my first week using my new cleaning schedule went well (and I've been almost 100% sticking to it...I didn't get the floors Swiffered on Friday...), although I already have some changes I think I need to make for next month.  I was up and down to the basement doing tons of laundry today, and I wasn't able to get it all put away or even folded--so I'm thinking that perhaps I should wash the loads on Sundays and spend Mondays folding and putting away?  I'm not sure, since my other laundry day right now is Thursday--and Thursday and Sunday are pretty close to each other.  I may have to shift laundry days entirely, or be more productive on Mondays--ha!  My in-laws came by the house on Saturday and my mother-in-law commented on how clean the house looked--which makes me think the cleaning schedule has been great, and also that apparently I didn't clean well enough for their previous visits...

my new scale--pretty, huh?

Fourth, I went back and revisited my Challenge #2 Outline post, because I've been failing some of those objectives a bit.  My midnight bedtime has crept back to 1am, which is not good--I love 8 hours of sleep!  And I think I need it, especially since I'm exercising and a lot busier during my days lately...and therefore, a lot more tired.  So I needed the reminder that midnight is my cut off time!  I've also been eating some after 8pm--Dan and I will eat fruit while we watch TV shows, and my new favorite nighttime treat is a banana dipped in melted chocolate!  So at least I'm not eating cupcakes and cookies on the couch, but I still need to make those late-night snacks fewer and farther between--every once in a while is okay, but not every night.  I also have been slacking a little bit on my water intake--I haven't been hitting my 64 ounces a day...and some days, not even close.  I know that's not helping me on the weight-loss front, so I need to be more cognizant of my water throughout the day.  And now that I'm doing these exercise classes on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, I haven't felt the urgency to work out on other days--but I think exercising 4 days a week isn't too much to ask.  I need to do something on my own at least one day a week--either my treadmill, or some strength training...even the stairs!  I just need to suck it up and add another day of exercise to my routine.  I am doing a really great job with my WebMD food journal--everything I eat goes in that thing!  I also measure everything I eat at home, so I'm achieving that objective as well.  I just need to step up my game and keep myself on track.  I've been sucked into weighing myself more frequently as well, which is so bad for my self-esteem...that scale just seems to call out to me...  So I need to restrict myself to only stepping on the scale on Sundays again, if only for my sanity.

will I become a crock pot convert?

And finally, I have to give a shout out to my awesome friend Julie.  Julie and I have been friends since we both tried out for our middle school cheerleading squad--we made the team, and have been friends ever since!  She was one of my bridesmaids at our wedding, and we were so fortunate to live in Ohio in the same city with her while Dan was in law school--she and I had many ice cream dates, and she was at the hospital when Abby was born.  :)  She is now married with a beautiful little girl of her own, and she has been a huge supporter of me in this blog endeavor.  She surprised the heck out of me today when a package from her (by way of Amazon) showed up on my doorstep--inside is a crock pot!  She told me to consider it a contribution to my Good Housewife Project.  :)  So cool and thoughtful--now I need to figure out how to use it!  Thank you, Julie!

Two Places at Once

Being part of a military family my whole life, I'm used to not being where I want to be when major life events happen.  My friends are far-flung around the country, and often, so is our family.  I remember getting a phone call when my nephew was born in Virginia, and I was living down in Texas--I had been fortunate to be visiting Virginia for the births of my three nieces, so hearing the news of my nephew over the phone, knowing that my whole family was together for that happy occasion, made me homesick in a way I hadn't experienced before.  I know there will be more instances of homesickness in the future, as Dan's career takes us all over the world.

I've also had the feeling that I'm not as portable as I once was since I had kids--Dan and I could do all the things that couples without children do (go out to dinner often, go to the movies, travel), and I was free to come and go if I needed to.  When I wanted some time with my friends (even the ones far away), I made it happen.  Before Dan and I got married, I desperately wanted to see my other best friend, Kerry, who lives in Massachusetts, so she and I planned a long weekend getaway to Dallas in 2002--the place where our friendship really blossomed when we lived together while we interned at the MADD National Office.  Our friendship is kind of funny, in that she and I have never lived in the same place, save for that crazy summer of 2000 in Texas.  She was my sounding board during Dan's first deployment in 2003, flying to Virginia to spend my birthday with me that year (and go to a Counting Crows concert!).  She was my maid of honor at our wedding in 2004, and came to Virginia for countless wedding events that year, which was so special to me since I don't get to see her that often.  I cried pulling away from our wedding reception because I had to say goodbye to all my bridesmaids, who had come from various states, and with whom I never got to spend any time all together.  Kerry has been my female lifeline--Dan holds the spot in my heart as my husband and titular Best Friend, but Kerry and I have a bond almost like sisters.  She and I tell each other everything in our lives, can talk for hours if we get the opportunity (which is rare!), and it never seems like we've been apart for long at all when we're able to visit each other.  We just pick up where we've left off, and no matter what, we know each other's backstory.  She has been there for me during some of the darkest times in my life, and really defines what a good friend and good person should be.

my girls at my wedding--Brynne, Kerry, Julie, and Daya

Since Dan and I got married, I've felt bad that I can't get to Kerry as easily as she can get to me--it always seems like the burden to visit falls on her.  Dan and I flew to Boston for a whirlwind weekend in 2005 (for business, but we did get to spend time with Kerry and meet her then-new boyfriend--a first for me, since I had never gotten to meet anyone in her life in person before!), and Kerry came out to Ohio to celebrate my 25th birthday with me that year as well.  She flew to Virginia in 2007 to meet Abby, and again in 2009 to meet Jake.  When Dan deployed in 2010, Kerry flew to Ohio to be my date to a friend's wedding so that I wouldn't have to go alone.  After the deployment was over, I asked Dan if I could leave for a weekend to go to Kerry--something I had never been able to do, since the kids and our family usually keep me home.  I flew to Boston in March of 2011, and had the best time--when she asked me what I wanted to do while I was there, I asked her to take me to Worcester to see all her old haunts from high school that I had heard so much about, and so that I could meet her parents for the first time!  Our most recent visit was this past summer, when she flew here and spent a few days with the kids and me--my kids adore their honorary Aunt Kerry!

Kerry and Abby in July 2007

Kerry meeting Jake for the first time in 2009

 

my wedding date in 2010--I was super pregnant with Alex!

Kerry with the kids this past summer

Today, I'm overwhelmed with the desire to be someplace I'm not--in Massachusetts, with Kerry.  She's having some health issues, and even though her boyfriend (the same one I first met back in 2005!) is there with her, I'm her best friend...when I got her text this morning, I just wanted to get on a plane and get there.  It's so hard to balance this feeling with my responsibilities here at home--I'm super anxious waiting to hear any news, and I just wish I could see her.  I know a visit from me would take her mind off things, and I so wish I could give that to her right now.  I can't--Dan has work, we have family plans, and the kids have a lot going on this weekend, so I can't just pick up and leave, even though I desperately want to.  She would do the same for me--she would be here in a heartbeat if I needed her.  I would love to sit on the couch with her, watch cheesy television, and just be there.  So instead, while I've been waiting for news today, I did laundry, dusted the upstairs, and wrote this blog to help me put my fears out of my mind and keep me busy.  She just texted to say she is on her way home from the hospital, and I am super relieved!  It doesn't get rid of my desire to be there, but at least now I can tell her how much I'm thinking about her...and start planning our next visit!

One Week In

Well, this weekend was a little rough for the Challenge, as I knew it would be.  I went into the birthday party on Saturday determined to be good while I was there--and despite the awesome spread of goodies, I stuck to carrots and fruit salad!  I even stood around the food table, but I didn't eat any of the not-so-good-for-me stuff...and honestly, I tried not to even look at that stuff on the table so that I wouldn't be tempted (although I couldn't miss my dear husband right next to me, chomping on what looked and sounded like delicious tortilla chips...).  My sweet friend Brynne made an awesome Toy Story birthday cake for her son, and of course I had to have a piece--I don't like it when I spend a ton of time making a cake for my kids' parties only to have folks not eat it...and let's just be honest--I like cake.  I took an interior piece, so not much icing at all--I splurged in what I thought was the healthiest way!  I felt really good about my choices leaving the party--even though I ate the cake, it's a birthday party...one of those real-world things I'm going to have to just work to incorporate into my day.

And that's where Saturday went off the rails for me.  We went back to my parents' house, since the birthday party was really close to where they live, and my mom fixed an awesome home-cooked meal for our family and my siblings' families, who all came over as well.  She made flank steak, sweet and baked potatoes, rolls, corn, and her famous "green"--a pear jello salad that we all devour, so much that she has to make two 9x13 pans of it!  Then for dessert, she made brownies from scratch and smothered them with vanilla ice cream and chocolate syrup.  I don't get my mom's homemade cooking all the time, so I take advantage when I do...  I knew she was making flank steak before we came over, so I looked up the calories on my trusty WebMD food log--not bad for 3oz., but I could swear I always eat way more than 3 oz.  I was cognizant of that when I made my plate, and tried to stick to smaller portions of the meat and everything else.  I passed on the rolls, had 2 small ears of corn, and half of a sweet potato...and a small bowl of green.  Seriously delicious!  After the kids ran around a bit while the adults sat around the table chatting, my mom brought out the brownies and ice cream, dished up and ready to be eaten.  It wasn't that much ice cream or that much syrup, but it was a pretty big brownie underneath--and so good!  When all was said and done, I ended up almost 600 calories over my daily goal for Saturday--and that 600 was only after I very generously estimated my calories out for the day considering I didn't do any actual working out...

my calorie tracker for Saturday--I really did eat more than 2000 calories!

So yeah, that really wasn't the greatest day, and I learned a few things:  1) Don't have dessert twice in one day.  (Duh!  In my defense, I didn't know my mom had fixed brownies and ice cream...so I didn't know I would be eating two desserts.  Obviously I could have passed on brownies and ice cream after I knew I had already had cake...but I'm not out of my mind!)  2) Homemade foods are really hard to track calorie-wise.  I had my mom's recipes for her flank steak marinade and for her green jello salad, so I input all the ingredients into my tracker, but then had a hard time figuring out how much I had eaten--1/8th of a serving?  2/3rds?  I just didn't know, and tried to extrapolate based on the fact that 8 other adults and 7 kids were eating the food with me...so obviously, I didn't eat the entire stick of cream cheese that was in the green all by myself...  Sunday and Monday were better days--although I still ate more calories than I should have, I was able to balance it out better by doing a workout on Sunday (an exercise show through our cable's OnDemand menu), and by cleaning on Monday (3 hours digging out Abby's messy room!).

all this calorie counting is hard work!

One bonus of being at my parents' house on Saturday was that I got to weigh myself on their scale--I always use their scale because it's digital and a lot better than ours, which is not.  Even after stuffing my face with my mom's cooking, I weighed 162.4--I lost 0.6 pounds since I had last weighed myself at their house 6 days earlier at the start of the Challenge.  Not exactly a resounding success for my effort, but I'll take a loss!  This week, I'm going to try to be more active--I'm so ridiculously sore after the TV workout I did on Sunday, but I'm ready for more.  Finally feeling healthy again!  After I attended my friend's Zumba class last week, my mother-in-law asked if the gym here on our military installation offers Zumba...so I looked into it, and they do!  It's pretty cheap, and they offer it in the evenings on Wednesdays and Fridays--so Dan can be home to watch the kids while I go.  As luck would have it, the first class is tonight--so I'm going!  They also offer an evening step class on Mondays, so I can get in 3 hour-long exercise sessions per week if I make this a regular thing.  Like I said, I've never really been a class person, so I'm nervous that I won't enjoy it--I mean, I really liked my friend's class, but part of the fun in that was that I knew I couldn't go every week, and I know her, so it was just fun to watch her in action and get a little social time afterward.  How will it be in a room full of unfamiliar faces?  I don't know, but I'm accepting the Challenge, and I'm going to find out!

I also want to send a shout-out to Brynne, because she has checked in with me numerous times since the start of the Challenge and given me lots of encouragement and advice from her own journey--thank you for being such a positive force in my life for literally as long as I can remember!  :)  Her own love of Zumba and her advice to "just go in there and shake what your mama gave you!" really gave me the courage I needed in my friend's class and going into this new class to just focus on me and not worry about anyone else--a hard thing to do for this Mommy!

Keeping up with the Joneses

Let me tell you a little bit more about my neighbor--the one who told me to exchange my Calphalon cookware that pretty much spawned The Good Housewife Project.  I just met her this summer, and we hit it off right away--in the military, you either make friends quickly, or you are a loner...and you can reinvent yourself from duty station to duty station or even year to year, because people come and go so frequently.  Last year at this same duty station, I was a bit of a loner--with the kids' ages, it was hard for me to get out as frequently as the other moms in our neighborhood, and my kids were too little to play on the bigger, more social playground outside our houses.  I was either stuck in my house during naptime, or alone with the boys at the little playground (dragging Abby reluctantly there with us when her friends were at the big kid playground).  I'm making more of an effort this year to be social and make friends--the boys are a little older, so we are slightly more flexible...and we got a new crop of neighbors who have been making it easier for me.  Dan works with my neighbor's husband and considers him his best work buddy (or, as my neighbor and I say, they are work spouses...ha ha), so it helps that our kids play well together and she and I get along well.  She is really great...in a way that can make me feel like I don't know what I'm doing.  :)

Little Playground fun for my 3 Musketeers

You never know what goes on behind closed doors, even with your good friends, but I get the feeling that she spends really great, quality time with her kids...and that makes me feel both impressed and insufficient!  We both stay at home, but I literally stay at home a lot--whereas my neighbor is constantly on the go.  I get it--I loved Ohio so much because I was constantly on the go, and exposing Abby to so many different people and activities really made me a better parent to her, as did the friendships I made through our moms' group there.  Here, I haven't really gotten into an on-the-go groove--with three kids, it's a lot harder for me to balance.  Jake and Alex both still take naps (long ones, if I'm lucky!), so I need to be home in time for lunch and naptime.  I also need to be home every day for the morning and afternoon bus stop runs to get Abby.  And then there are the kids' activities--Abby's dance and gymnastics, and Jake's gymnastics, all during the week.  I just feel a lot more tied to the house than I did when I had fewer, non-school-aged kids.  And sometimes I stay home by choice--like I said, I haven't been in the best head space for the last year or more, so getting up and going is hard when you just don't feel like it.  There's always the excuse of laundry and cleaning and cooking (okay, maybe not cooking for me) that keeps me in the house more than out.  But my neighbor doesn't seem constrained by these things--granted, she has one fewer kid than I do, but we live in the exact same house (right next door to each other), so I know what she faces in terms of housework!  She would be the last one to say that she has it all together, but I'm always really impressed with what she has going on...and that makes me wonder if I should have that going on, too.

Our houses--I'm in the middle, and my awesome neighbor is to the right

Today, I'm ordering pizza for dinner.  It's Friday, I'm tired, and the kids (and Mommy and Daddy!) all love pizza.  We haven't ordered it in a while, so it's kind of a treat.  And, I'm feeling a little guilty because I'm going out tonight for a "girls' night"--I rarely go out at all, much less go out before the kids are in bed like I'm doing tonight, so maybe I'm bribing my family with pizza so that they'll be happy with me before I ditch them and make them cry (Dan may cry the hardest at having to do the bedtime routine by himself--sorry, honey!).  I told my neighbor that I was ordering pizza, and she said, "You should blow Dan away and make your own pizza crust--it's super easy!  I just made some for tonight--all you need is flour, yeast, salt, and water!"  My immediate response to her was, "Yeah, that's just not my thing--as soon as you said 'yeast,' I mentally checked out."  As the words were coming out of my mouth, though, I thought about The Project.  Does The Project mean that making pizza dough from scratch should be my thing?  Does making my own pizza dough make me a Good Housewife?  I don't know the answer to those questions, nor do I know what I'm supposed to do once I have freshly baked homemade pizza crust (how do you do the cheese and the toppings?  I don't keep cheese on hand...what kind of cheese do you even use on pizza?  I'm sure Pinterest could help me here)...but I didn't say that to my neighbor.  We were having this conversation sitting on her couch watching the kids play, while enjoying some homemade chocolate graham crackers that she had just pulled out of the oven.  Seriously.  I wasn't sure how ignorant of this whole housewife thing I could prove to be without her kicking me out of her house.

This is my idea of "make your own pizza"  :)

This brings me to my current dilemma:  Does The Good Housewife Project mean I should be trying to keep up with my neighbors and do all the fancy housewifely things that they do, or does being a Good Housewife mean different things to different families?  My neighbor doesn't do all her family's laundry--I do (not that I'm necessarily proud of that fact...bragging that your husband helps you do laundry is way cooler than bragging that you do it all yourself, in my opinion).  Does that mean that in order to be a Good Housewife, she should be doing all her family's laundry?  In her family, no.  I need to figure out what makes me a Good Housewife in my family--that may very well include making pizza dough from scratch (and I think my neighbor is going to make sure that I at least attempt it, and for the sake of The Project and ensuring she doesn't think I'm a total idiot, I will), but it may also include ordering pizza every once in a while to give everyone a break.  I think my current definition of a Good Housewife also has to include some verbiage about being good to myself (can you be a Good Housewife if you're not a Happy Housewife?  Maybe in the 1950's, but I'm not sure I can), and for me, that could mean having some boundaries and not trying to do it all (from scratch!).